Teacher Bashing, Politics, and Vulgar Language — Is this Acceptable Restaurant Conversation?
Where have all the manners gone? Where is the politeness that we used to have? Gone.
Last night my husband and I went out to a much-anticipated dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant. We were eager not only to enjoy a delicious meal, but my husband Alan had acquired a bottle of wine that we both wanted to try. After a hectic work week, we were looking forward to a very pleasant, relaxing evening.
In the area of the restaurant where we were seated, there were five tables, four filled with happy diners laughing and enjoying the warm, friendly atmosphere. We greeted those we knew and sat down.
The fifth table was soon to be occupied by a family of six, grandparents, parents, and two teenage girls. The pleasant relaxing atmosphere changed abruptly. Their conversation was loud and filled with vulgarities as the adults bashed teachers and loudly proclaimed their dislike for certain people in political office. The grandfather used words that were downright disgusting and detailed what horrible things he’d like to see done to President Biden and Vice-President Harris.
I’m pretty easy-going with anyone’s opinions; we’re all entitled to our own opinions. That’s fine but it was the unbelievable gutter vocabulary and terrible things being said that was upsetting. Other diners began looking uneasy and two people at another table, clearly annoyed by the obscenities, got up to leave. I heard one person say how appalling it was for the grandfather and the mother to speak that way in front of their teenagers.
Their voices got louder, and I glanced at them. The mother stood up and advanced at me. She was a large woman, and it was obvious, by the way she puffed out her chest and curled her hands into fists, that she intended to use her size to intimidate me. What she said next blew me away.
“What the f**k are you staring at, you c**t!”
My husband intervened and the woman began calling him names as well. I stood up and asked her to please not come any closer, to calm down as no one was staring at her. Her teenage daughter yelled at me to “Shut up, you f**king c**t!”
Wow, I thought, your mom must be so proud of you!
After her tirade, the woman did sit down but the vulgarities continued, louder and more frequently as the mother told everyone what she’d like to do to a certain teacher and the grandfather kept up a litany of profanities against politicians and what he’d like to do to them. All the deeds are reprehensible, disgusting, violent, and not fit for print.
Sorry to say that the owners did nothing to stop this scene nor ask the people causing it to please refrain from vulgarities. They let it play out. And that was the wrong way to deal with this incident.
After they left, with one daughter throwing a hysterical hissy fit over something she didn’t like on the way out, the owner came over and apologized, saying what can you do?
Well, I’ll tell you what you can do. You can tell customers to please refrain from vulgar language and tell them they will have to leave if they don’t do so. I understand it’s business and owners don’t want to lose customers but, seriously, what about people, steady customers, who witnessed this ‘show’? Perhaps you’ll lose their business. Is it worth that? Please the loud, obscenity spouting customer who was a one-time patron, just to risk losing loyal patrons? I don’t think so.
Cursing, foul language, using the F-word as a noun, adjective, and adverb is too common and too accepted. My husband jokingly calls those who use those words “English majors.” But it’s not a joke anymore. It’s a serious, disgusting annoyance.
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